Previously Written: Two Hip Hop Snobs Eat Shit

This is the first of many poems I wrote featuring a character named Louis. He represents someone with whom I've been best friends since high school (I'll leave his real name a mystery). In either ninth or tenth grade I would go to his house on Fridays, play videogames and basketball and return home on Sundays, most weekends at least. Anyway, he's a man of very few words and many people find him very difficult to talk to. For this reason I find this poem, which is a paraphrased conversation, very pleasing.

Two Hip Hop Snobs Eat Shit

(Nelly is a mainstream rapper.)
(Jason Kidd plays basketball.)

Me and Louis drink Feldschlösschen at the tram stop

Nelly’s so bad
Really fuckin stupid
You remember that line?
“I’m just kidding like Jason”
“I’m just kidding like Jason!”
Hahaha
Who the fuck is Jason
He just picked a fucking name
I’m just kidding like Bob
Had to rhyme with basement
He’s all – what rhymes with basement
Random ass fucking Jason
Like we know how Jason Kidds

Our eyes meet with horror